Sunday, 1 May 2016

eternal


she's thriving at almost everything except one thing, but it has never gotten this ruthless. she fathoms that sometimes the days aren't all bright and sunny. she's cognizant of the fact that sometimes storm comes and makes her drown. but the storm is always ephemeral, right? it'll come and go, isn't it?

"but why does my storm never go away?", she thought to herself.

she struggled to calm herself, convincing herself over and over again that everyone is suffering this. everyone is insecure and everyone has issues about their own selves. and she does too, terribly. 

it's been getting worse this year, though. and she's been responding to the devil voices in her head vigorously too. those voices aren't her friend; she knows. but why did she forfeit? the word weakness ricochets in her skull.

one day, she just got back home and found herself glaring at the mirror attentively, and quietly. there's something fiery in her eyes. she was staring at her own self but it was hatred fuming in her eyes. a part of her realized it, but a part of her was not even hers anymore.

she moved towards her reflection in the mirror and stared deeply at her own self. breathing heavily, full of repugnance, she blurted out the scariest words she'd ever imagined she would say out loud to her own self. she was stunned, taken aback by what has just happened.

"was that real? did i say that?", waves of thoughts buzzed in her mind. she was awfully scared.

it was real. deep down, that sane part of her knew it was real. she ran into her room, locked herself up and cried. but she vowed she'd never let those voices take possession of her sanity again.

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